It’s a matter of perspective…

So….most of us see wounding as an awful thing. But it does not have to be. Let’s look at it from a different perspective. I am reading an interesting book that addresses this topic. It says that “at the time wounding takes place it is very difficult but necessary to look at what happened in new and fresh ways. We must stop repeating to ourselves and others the details of the events or people that caused us the pain. The reason is not to deny the facts but to push ourselves out of the seduction of tunnel vision and into a broader landscape that could reveal to us incredible opportunities for growth. We must ask ourselves hard questions like are we in a cauldron of pain or smack dab in the middle of opportunity? Should I fret and whine or can I see this suffering as God’s Hand pulling me into new story”…..a new place He wants me to be? Love this quote: “Suffering cracks the boundaries of what we thought we could stand. And yet, through these cracks sprout seeds of healing and transformation.”


Jeff & Cheryl Scruggs

Jeff and Cheryl Scruggs are authors, speakers, and Biblical counselors, not LPC's. Their writings include the widely used book I Do Again, which chronicles their thirty-year story of marriage, betrayal, infidelity, divorce, emotional damage and scarring, forgiveness, reconciliation, trust, and remarriage to each other. Jeff and Cheryl are the founders of Hope Matters Marriage Ministries in Dallas. They speak at conferences and weekend worship services in churches across the nation, sharing their love story of hope, redemption, restoration, and God taking hold of their lives. See their website:

This Post Has 2 Comments

  1. Sandydeann

    This really is a wonderful way to look at it. Exactly what Phillippians is all about. God allows us to go through things to make Himself known. Working all things towards good. That good is making Himself known.

  2. Deceived

    Easier said than done. My wife had an affair with what i thought was a close friend. She gave her body to him in hotel rooms and had a secret phone that she kept hidden for 7 months this went on. Texting, calling and sexual meetings. I will always love this woman, I accept my responsibility for the lonliness she felt but I am struggling to forgive her and look at her in a way that I respect. she gave her body and soul to a pig of a man that is also married. One minute i look at her and love her so much and the next I want her to suffer for what she did to me. I am on the verge of tears every day and it doesnt take much to go there. I look at pics of her during the times she was meeting him 2 or 3 times a week and here I thought we were okay. It makes me sick to my stomach. How did you ever look at your wife the same again Jeff? How did you do this? Didnt you see her as “damaged” or “dirty”?

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